space4grace

a real experience

jagged darkness
empty eyes
embarrased
sexual abuse
name calling
scared
no trust
anger, bitter, jealous
violence
a safe place
control
eating disorder
alcohol, pot, cocaine
Pain
loneliness
wanting more
a girl who wanted to be loved
what was love?
love = sex
sex with men, women and groups
controlled sex
prostitution
attempted suicide
painful or me full of pain
drinking, hangovers, throwing up in a van
in a hotel parking lot
searching
for the next fix
searching
get home
find home
where is home
confused
journey home
is home hell on earth?
Jesus
a real experience
He touched my heart
Jesus is real
I heard His voice
I opened my mind
I opened my heart
I welcomed Jesus
Jesus healed my heart
He healed my mind
He healed my emotions
Forgiveness
Discovery
Love was not sex
Journey
More Forgiveness
Freedom
Sweetness
Light
Rescue
Chains broken
Soothing my Soul
Love
Generosity
Believe in Jesus
Choice
Easier to believe in Him than in what my life was like before Him
Deliver Me! (Screaming)
Stopped smoking cigarettes
Stopped smoking pot
Stopped snorting coke
Must stop sleeping around
Jesus forgive me - weeping
Jesus help
Jesus restore me
Who am I?
God’s child
Christ’s friend
A citizen of heaven
complete in Christ
forgiven of all my sins
a temple of the living God
I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound mind
I can approach God with freedom and confidence
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me
I have an eternal destination - it is heaven
heaven on earth
and heaven with God

Don't Make God Get Out the Lopers!

It is written in John 15:2 (NLT), "He cuts off every branch that doesn’t produce fruit and He prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more."

This is a pretty tough example of how God disciplines us. It is clear to me that if we are God’s church and we aren’t doing something to accomplish the Great Commission, then God will cut that person off. We might still see those people running around saying they are Christians. All the while waving a banner of bad relationships, poor health, financial woes, bouncing from job to job; so we see them visually, but we don’t see them spiritually.

The good news is that God is patient. He allows the branch or person to grow. To get watered from the well, to get nutrients from the same source. So the question is: What are you doing with the water, the nutrients? Are you allowing them to change you from the inside, producing fruit on the outside? Is the rain and wind making you stronger, allowing your branch to reach for the sun or is it just laying in the dirt, giving the slugs, snails and rolly pollys an opportunity to crawl and eat your leaves? Jesus died on the cross for us, that is the free gift of salvation. God also loved us so much that when He created us, He gave us free will. We must chose to drink the water and let the weather of life make us stronger through the renewing of our mind (2 Cor. 10:5 NLT). Don’t make God get out the lopers!

Confident Faith

Life comes at you fast and hard. Especially with the information age taking on a new look. For goodness sakes we can put microchips in our pets and aging parents. Not only is technology changing rapidly, but the face of the earth is as well. The earth experienced a tsunami that washed away a part of India and then there was Hurricane Katrina that changed the face of New Orleans. We are still uncertain of what the new New Orleans will resemble, or if there will even be one. With everything that is changing around us, the relationship that we have with God is the foundation for our security. Our relationship with the creator of the world is the only place to confidently invest our faith.

It is written in 2 Peter 1:3-5 (NLT), "As we know Jesus better, his divine power gives us everything we need for living a godly life. He has called us to receive his own glory and goodness! And by that same mighty power, he has given us all of his rich and wonderful promises. He has promised that you will escape the decadence all around you caused by evil desires and that you will share in his divine nature. So make every effort to apply the benefits of these promises to your life. Then your faith will produce a life of moral excellence."

God is the only one that can help us live a godly life. He does that through the power of the Holy Spirit. Some call it taking the high road. One of the latest bracelets is "WWJD" known for "what would Jesus do?" The task of trying to figure out what He would do in any given circumstance is so overwhelming because He knows the whole story, we don’t. He has all the facts, we don’t. He knows the heart of all involved, we don’t. He knows agendas, desperation, gratitude, kindness, and faith levels, we don’t.

In every human interaction, whether it is at the grocery store, city traffic, through a telephone call, government agency, in the hospital or the janitor at your job - let’s show the world that the Jesus living in us is full of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. This will increase our faith, making it confident and secure to the promises of God’s Word and it will show a healthy Jesus to the world. 

http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=moral

Virtuous

implies moral excellence and loftiness of character: "The life of the nation is secure only while the nation is honest, truthful, and virtuous" (Frederick Douglass).

Confident Faith

come see where i was born

It is with great joy that I can invite people to the place where I was born. Hello, I am not referring to my first birth; but to my born again experience with Jesus Christ. The two places contrast in love, excellence and equipping. As a child, there were never invitations handed out or implied that invited kids over to my house. It was an unsafe place. In that environment I had been shamed through sexual abuse. Anger was a common emotion that made us “family”.

On the other hand, when I invite friends and family to where I was born, my real birth. The place I crawled into broken, distraught, tainted, full of sexual sin and drug addiction, emotional bondage and literally spiritually sick is my home church, Shoreline Christian Center www.shoreline.net, it is also the place where I give back the life that Jesus gave to me.

1 Peter 1:3-4 (NLT), “All honor to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, for it is by his boundless mercy that God has given us the privilege of being born again...For God has reserved a priceless inheritance for his children. It is kept in heaven for you, pure and undefiled, beyond the reach of change and decay.”

So sweet is my Father in heaven to allow me to be born in a house full of grace, generosity and discipleship. For these are what I needed to experience in order to become who God the Father chose long ago, and the Holy Spirit has made me into today.

what are we hoping for?

In spite of all that takes place in life, Lord, reign down your hope and create a passionate hope into those who carry your Word in their hearts as to what can be accomplished!

Hebrews 6:11 (NLT), "Our great desire is that you will keep right on loving others as long as life lasts, in order to make certain that what you hope for will come true."

What are we hoping for?

We are hoping for the eradication of every kind of cancer. That not one more child, mother, father, aunt, uncle, brother, grandmother, grandfather, or friend will die of cancer or even have to go through chemo or a bone marrow transplant to treat cancer.

We are hoping that not one more child would be aborted.

We are hoping that not one child would be lost to a miscarriage.

We are hoping that not one more child would be sexually, physically or mentally abused.

We are hoping to get married and bind together our purpose for God's glory.

We are hoping for restored marriages.

We are hoping for a generation that will grow up and love the Lord their God with all their heart, mind and soul.

We are hoping that our families would come to acknowledge, accept and become fully devoted followers of Jesus Christ.

We are hoping that not one more person would become addicted to mind altering drugs.

We are hoping for financial freedom. This freedom looks like many things to different people. Whether you are a fully devoted follower of Jesus Christ or you have only accepted Jesus and then continue to live like you always have or you have no clue about Christianity or what Jesus did at the cross for you; we are painfully aware that resources are required in order to move forward in our lives. Some of us may work like crazy valuing over time or knock on doors of those who have financial means or simply adjust our lives to the lifestyle that we can afford and still some of us pray through for the financial breakthrough that we trust and hope in God to deliver.

The bottom line is that we are told to keep loving others inspite of their shortcomings, so that what we put our hope into would come to pass in our lifetime.

Mocking Bird Bomber

It is a great day in the life of parents when they see God moving in the lives of their children. A parent I am not; however, I can recognize the joy that floods my sister’s heart as she protects her children like a mother bear with her baby cubs.

When I was a little girl, a long time ago, there was a bush outside of my mom’s house and a mocking bird nested there. In the Spring this bird would start attacking everyone that walked past who had any height on them. That momma bird would dive bomb into my head and hair trying to protect her babies. What the momma bird didn’t know was I wasn’t after her babies. I was just trying to walk past the bush to get into my house.

My sister knew there was an enemy attacking her family. That is why she called me at midnight, crying, upset, and afraid. It was very clear satan was attacking. There were roadblocks on the path to her children’s destiny, so she had to call in the troops, the prayer warrior, someone she could count on to pray for her family’s best interest, God’s will and plan for their lives. That someone was me, smile! I have to tell you that hasn’t always been the case. About 14 years prior, I was the family member everyone wanted to dodge, avoid, and walk around. But because Jesus is alive, so am I and all the relationships in my life are blossoming for Him.

My first question to her was, "Had she repented for trying to take the reins from God’s hand and direct traffic?" so to speak. Without taking a breath, she started repenting. I was shocked and didn’t expect that response at all. But I also knew that a repentant heart was something that God could totally work through.

So I prayed God’s promise in Psalm 97:5 (NLT), "The mountains melt like wax before the Lord, before the Lord of all the earth."

This was a moment in my life where I knew that God was going to conquer small town politics. That God would protect her children. That no devil or lie would steal their destiny. I knew that no Kuwait contract recruiter could lure her young son to a foreign land for a 100K. As a mom, she had to help Cracker Jack muddle through the SAT process and everything else that comes along for a senior because high school counselors didn’t reach out to him since he was a B and C student. That mountain melted like wax on Tuesday, April 25 when Cracker Jack was hired at HEB as a bagger and when he came home to find his SAT score over 1500 and he received a $3000 scholarship from CTC.

Psalm 97:9 (NLT), "For you, O Lord, are most high over all the earth; you are exalted far above all gods."

All the while dealing with a Tumblina Daughter who was devastated by the cheerleader tryout program. You will have to read she gave her best to find how Psalm 97:10b (NLT), "He protects the lives of his godly people and rescues them from the power of the wicked" became alive and true.

she gave her best

About a month ago, I said the sweetest words I have ever heard were from my dentist. But today, when my niece called and told me that the judges reversed their decision on the final selection for the 2007cheer leading team; now those were truly the sweetest words I have ever heard.

In her world cheerleading is everything. She started off as a tumbler when she was three and from there went to competitions on private teams. Then in middle school, in addition to tumbling she became a cheerleader. She eats, drinks, sleeps and thinks tumbling and cheerleading, 24-7.

When she first discovered she didn’t make the team, she was devastated. She cried for two days straight. My heart went out for my sister because she didn't know how to console her daughter.  My job was to offer words of encouragement and hope to them both, but privately.  I explained that sometimes God’s will wasn’t what our plan was. And that God could very well be protecting her from something that we don’t know about. I encouraged them to trust God. He created Tumblina Niece and this would be an opportunity for her to take the high road. She still had to train the other “new” cheerleaders. My self-esteem could have never handled that situation like she did. Tumblina Niece gave the new team her best. As if that wasn’t enough drama for the child, she discovered the “new” cheerleaders were going to take private instruction from her teacher at the same time, in an environment that was hers, where she was the lead; she handled it like a pro. I don’t think she flinched once. Of course, her mom and I were freaking out.

Exactly three weeks since tryouts and the final announcements Tumblina Niece was making new plans for her life.  She was wrapping up first period in physical education, with her hair all wet and sweaty; when the news traveled down the hall like a bolt of lightning. The judges reversed their decision for some of the cheerleaders. Then Tumblina Niece heard her name announced over the intercom to come to the principal’s office. Her heart fluttered like a butterfly. She grabbed her tennis shoe, one on, one off and ran like the wind. The joy of the Lord had been her strength. Oh my goodness, my sister is raising a woman, according to Proverbs 31:25 (NLT), “She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs with no fear of the future.”

when faith & reality collide

It was once said by Max DePree, "the first responsibility of a leader is define reality."

The struggle, which likens itself to spiritual warfare, comes when reality and faith collide. People of the world call it being optimistic, or the cup is half full instead of half empty. The believer calls it faith.

The reality was that I owned a mobile home in South Austin and really wanted to move closer to my home church. There were no mobile home parks in the area, so I decided to sell it. For two years, faithfully, I lifted up the sale of the mobile home in prayer. Believing that God put this desire in my heart and that He would be the one to do it. The reports said that mobile homes had no resale value. I would take a significant loss. That journey in the natural was just about as discouraging as my life of singleness. There seems to be not one interested party. Maybe people are as afraid of mobile homes as men are of relationships...who knows?

"I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be astounded. They will put their trust in the Lord."

Psalm 40:1-3 (NLT)

Well, I had to take the reality of owning a mobile home on the wrong side of the tracks and apply God’s promises to them while I waited. And wait I did. At the time, it seemed to be the longest two years of my life. Then one day out of the blue, a buyer stepped up to the plate. It wasn’t a hard sale. There wasn’t a big loss. All I had to do was pay the transportation fees of moving it to their land. Small change of $700.

That is a great reminder of applying God’s Word and waiting. I am sure there were days of discouragement, though I can hardly remember them.  But what a valuable lesson to learn about God’s timing. It was perfect. He lined up the purchase of a home less than six months after the mobile home sale. He lined up a job with the pay required to purchase a home. He put it in my heart what side of town to live on and wala, a new subdivision was started there.

So I’ll continue to wait for the mighty man of valor that God promised me in 1999. Knowing my God is faithful. Sure, I’ll acknowledge reality, that I am living a life of singleness.  That I get to work as many hours as I want.  Go on vacation when and where I want.  Buy the car, sofa, and lawnmower that I want.  But all that stuff doesn't bring comfort in the wee hours of the night, when it becomes painfully clear that I am single.  So I am going to glue God’s Word all over my desire to be married! And I’ll drink from the cup that never runs dry. And many will see what my God will do again!

listen & learn

Each Sunday morning, many of us get up, go to church, sing songs of praise and worship, hear the sermon and depart to Luby’s as quickly as possible. Won’t we pause for just a minute and allow what has happened at church, penetrate our hearts, travel to our minds and into our ears and back into our hearts? Won’t we just listen and learn?

I love to challenge people with giving a year to God. Sacrifice your whole life for one year to God. Of course, keep working, don't be a sluggard in the process! Attend Bible studies and grow in your knowledge of who He is, what He has done and how He has a eternal plan for you. Find out the true meaning of love, God will show you.  This much I know about his character.  Give yourself to God and all eternity will be awaiting for you. Try true repentance, which is acknowledging your sin, turning away from it and turning to God. I know that if people would do that day in and day out for a complete year - letting Jesus rule and reign in their hearts, in their relationship, in their finances; then they would experience a whole lot of Isaiah 6:3 (NLT), "In a great chorus they sang, ‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord Almighty! The whole earth is filled with his glory!’ The glorious singing shook the Temple to its foundations, and the entire sanctuary was filled with smoke."